The Power of Random Acts of Kindness
The Stoic Random Act of Kindness Challenge
Years ago, I signed up for a “30-day Stoic Challenge” with a group of guys in a mastermind. One of the daily challenges was a random act of kindness. At the time, I was looking for an opportunity to give a stranger a $100 bill. When the day came for this challenge, I was ready to spring into action. I had already selected a janitor in the parking garage of my gym as my top candidate. He and I shared a relationship based on waving at each other in the garage over several years.
I have always admired his work ethic. In Texas, we experience temperatures ranging from the 20s to 110s over the course of a year. No matter the weather, Juan was always busy at work cleaning the parking facility. I also admired his positive attitude and willingness to do a job, likely without many “thank you” or even much human contact at all. If you have read the book or seen the movie The Razor’s Edge, you know what I mean.
I gave Juan that $100 bill and told him how much I appreciated his hard work. His face lit up. For years after that event, we have exchanged waves as I parked at the gym.
I never asked Juan what he did with the money. But I felt great, particularly seeing his reaction. That feeling lasted for months.
Ripple Effects from Kindness Act
Apart from the obvious effect of this random act of kindness, there was also an unforeseen ripple effect. It started when I tried to buy the $100 bill from a waitress while having breakfast. She asked me why I needed it. As I explained the story, she broke down in tears that someone would do that. Her reaction affected everyone at the table.
Fast forward five years — Juan now has a job working in the men’s locker room at the gym, and I get to talk to him about five times a week.
Lessons from Random Acts of Kindness
Reflecting on this experience, here are a few takeaways to consider:
From a self-serving perspective, doing something nice for others almost always guarantees you will feel better. In fact, it is about as powerful a tool as I have experienced in getting out of a funk. The bigger, the bolder, and the more random your act of kindness, the more significant the impact on them and you.
It is impossible to know the secondary and beyond effects your acts will have in the community—or on yourself.
Based on my experience, anonymous acts of kindness land with bigger impact than doing something nice for someone in your orbit. Don’t get me wrong; I am all in favor of doing unexpectedly nice things for people I interact with. But when a stranger helps you, it feels even more impactful.
Each of us struggles inside in our own ways, and as whole, we mostly hide it. If you can craft a kindness act to ease that struggle, you may likely hit a home run with that person in ways you could never imagine.
Much of the positive experience of this practice is in the planning and selection phase: who, what, why, how, etc.
I have done several fashionable kindness acts like picking up the tab for police officers or buying the order of the person ahead of me or behind me in line. These are all positive. But none of those have landed with as much impact as direct kindness to a total stranger.
We are leaving comments open for this post, so if you are inclined to try out this practice, please share how that random act of kindness worked out in the comments section.
Happiness Posts is published by Darin M. Klemchuk founder of Klemchuk PLLC, an intellectual property law firm located in Dallas, Texas and co-founder of Engage Workspace for Lawyers, a coworking space for lawyers. He also publishes the Ideate (law) and Elevate (law firm culture) blogs. You can find more information about his law practice at his firm bio and also at his BioSite.